Selected jokes, aphorisms and definitions
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Issue 14, 04.10.00
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~ QUESTIONS and ANSWERS ~
- Is there life on the Sun?
- Of course there is, but only at night.
- Why do cats need hair?
- Did you ever try to walk the streets naked?
- Where's the beginning of the end that ends the beginning?
- In the same place as the end of the beginning that starts the end.
- Can you paint balls with a paintbrush?
- Yes, if you're not ticklish.
- Who is the head of the household?
- The one who gets up later in the morning.
~ ANSWERS to APHORISMS ~
- You were asked to look in on them, and you're listening in as well!
- One can't do a good job of looking in without listening in.
- If you woke up in the morning and everything seems good - you've missed something!
- If you woke up in the morning - it's already good.
- When you're angry, count to three. When you're very angry - curse!
- Counting to three! All those who didn't hide can only blame themselves!
- Beauty is a terrible force.
- A man is born free or beautiful.
- It's hard to keep quiet when you're not asked.
- Noone has better command of his tongue than one who can keep it still.
~ FUNNY DICTIONARY ~
ME- the creature we always put above its equals.
PATRIOTISM- a conviction that one country is higher than the rest just because you were born there.
MIXED FEELINGS- when your mother-in-law is falling into a canyon in your brand new car.
BABY CARRIAGE- first car.
RESERVE- a reason to train your memory if you ever want to find it again.
~ ONE LINERS ~
You smiled so diversely...
Hit a corner I have found -
The world isn't very round.
I'm not at all like people often see me.
Allow me to disallow you that.
The patient felt better - he died.
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