Selected jokes, aphorisms and definitions ...... Issue 26, 20.09.01

~ QUESTIONS and ANSWERS ~


- Is the "Carnation" cologne a good mosquito repellent?
- Don't know, never drank it.
 (c) Alex

- How much is conscience nowadays?
- What, you have nothing else to sell?
 (c) Svetlyachok

- What is horsepower?
- It's the power of a horse with the height of one meter and weight of one kilogram.
 (c) Emelya-the fool

- Statistically, husbands discuss problems with wives, and wives - with female friends and relatives. Why?
- Because husbands have problems with their business, and wives have problems with their husbands.
 (c) Pro

~ ANSWERS to APHORISMS ~


- When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.
 (c) Mark Twain
- While counting, think up good swear words.
 (c) Slava

- Everyone is a hero in his dreams.
 (c) S.Freud
- And everyone is Kasanova in his wet dreams.
 (c) Jag

- The day was lost to drinking.
 (c) SkyLanSe
- So was the watch.
 (c) Anna

- Life is not healthy - people die from it.
 (c) NN
- I decided to live forever. Everything's going fine so far!
 (c) NN

~ FUNNY DICTIONARY ~


ALIMONY- a fine one has to pay for a mistake of two.
 (c) Marti Larni

CITY- a population center where the coordinates of a dwelling include height.
 (c) NN

CHESS- a game where a check can result in a mate.
 (c) NN

ADMIRATION- highest degree of ignorance.
 (c) * DIK

~ One-Liners ~


Oh! How suddenly... I came home from the office...
 (c) Pavlin

How often I resolved to keep from loving...
 (c) Phil

It's only children what we have in common.
 (c) Penilopa

I loved you while my money was abundant...
 (c) mul'ka

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